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La cucina. (deancas, s9 au, food food food)
…if any man hears my voice, and opens the door, I will come in to him, and will eat with him, and he with me. -Revelation 3:20
They are sitting in the library and Dean can still kind of smell it, the scent of cheap shampoo lingering in the air above Castiel’s head, the warm soapy aura of contentment he’s giving off. His cheeks are kind of pink, his hair is damp and curling a little at the back of his neck. He looks like he scrubbed himself within an inch of his life. Dean knows he was in there for half an hour, maybe a little more. Sam had banged on the door and asked if Castiel was okay, and there had been a long silence, and then a very wet and red-faced Castiel in the doorway soaking the rug, telling Sam he was fine, he’d just figured out the right temperature, was it okay if he just- stood there for a while? He’d cleaned himself off already, he said. Sam had told him to go nuts. Dean hadn’t told him anything, because Dean was hiding in his room like a baby, pretending to be usefully getting Castiel some fresh clothes to wear, in reality mostly wondering why the fuck he was freaking out.
sometimes i lie awake at night thinking about where my time goes. i don’t have to wonder. i already know. my alarm goes off at 5am. i hit snooze until 5:15, then I get out of bed and take a shower and get dressed and throw a frozen dinner in a plastic bag for lunch. i feed the cats. i leave for work at 6. i get to work around 7:15. i work until 4pm. i take as many tumblr breaks as i can manage. sometimes i write fics during my lunch breaks. i get home around 5:15. i cook dinner. the man of science comes home; we eat on the couch. i go online to see if i have coursework; i usually do. i read articles and textbooks and write essays and IDPs and faux lesson plans. i clean up the kitchen if i have enough energy. i feed the cats. sometimes we watch an episode of tv on the couch or in bed. i go to sleep around 10 or 11, or earlier if i’m lucky, which i know must seem like an insanely early bedtime to nightowls, but going to bed at 11 only gives me six hours of sleep and i function best with about nine hours. which i never get until saturday, the day of household chores and laundry and further work on coursework and looking at budgets and receipts. maybe a bike ride if we can fit one in. maybe a grocery store run if there’s time. sunday we spend having lunch with my family and dinner with his. the weekends are as exhausting and jam-packed as the workweeks.
life is exhausting. life is merciless. i would like to have more time to exercise. i would like to have the energy to plan out nice meals and cook enough to have leftovers for healthy lunches at work. i would like to have the time and money to go out and buy nice clothes and get a decent haircut. i would like to have time to go out and have coffee with a friend. i would like to have the time to put into maintaining a friendship. but instead i spend ten hours a week driving to work. i have no time. no time. none. sometimes i find it incredible that i manage to do anything extra at all. i still haven’t found time to watch this week’s spn episode. it’s only forty-five minutes and i don’t have time for it.
in case you were wondering where i go and what i do: this is it. this is all there is. the exciting years of college do not prepare you for the mind-numbing boring-ness and unyielding endless cycles of real life. have a doughnut. you will need one.
Tell him. Tell him now before it’s too late.
all right. I know it’s almost ten p.m. and I’m pretty much brain dead from writing papers ever since I got home from work BUT I have a very pressing need for DCBB suggestions and good ol’ ficlet prompts. I fucked up writing a DCBB last year and this time I want to do it right so ideas?